The constant need for validation

December 09, 2021

Proma Nautiyal

Why do we feel the need to be loved, revered, and accepted by everyone we cross paths with?

Hi there,

How’s the week going for you?

Weekend’s here and so is some food for thought.

The need for validation is real deal. Consciously or subconsciously we need it most of the time until we do not.

You read that right. For some people the peace of not needing any kind of validation and approval is real and it’s an immensely fulfilling place to be in.

Once of the best parts about being free from the need of validation is that it frees you from FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) as well. The reason being both stem from a lack of self awareness.

While I have read extensively on this subject and have applied the same to my life, and I know for a fact that it truly works if done right, I will refrain from putting them down in words over here for you. Since I am not an expert, it will be wrong on my part to do the same.

Instead, I will go ahead and share a couple of books that helped me tremendously in building the right amount of care I need to give and get.

The first one being Karma Yoga by Swami Vivekananda and the second one, Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz.

In this world of rapid digitisation, the constant need to find out what’s next, and keeping up with the present rather than living in it, we are losing out on the soulful conversations with ourselves.

While I always say Meditation & Mindfulness can cure a lot of issues, it’s not easy to stay still for a long while for most of us. To all of those who find that to be a problem, I would recommend a cup of warm tea or coffee and a 30-minute chat with just yourself. A warm heart-to-heart where you find out more about yourself. Ask yourself:

  • What makes you, you? The virtues and the vices.

  • Why do you do what you do?

  • How does the world make you feel and how you really want to feel?

  • What you truly love doing vs. what you do because it’s expected of you?

Once you start here, the journey onwards is beautiful. Cause at the end of the day, the only validation we all need is that of our own-selves.

I hope you enjoyed reading this issue and I was able to add some value to your day. Do share it via twitter and tag me if you think this could help others as well. Would appreciate it!

Until next time,

Take care & stay safe,

Cheers,

Proma

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